#22

The internal networking skill that gets you promoted

Reader,

Most men think careers work like this:

Work hard → get noticed → get promoted.

That’s the story we tell ourselves because it feels fair.

But in most companies, the process looks more like this:

Work hard → build relationships → get pulled into better rooms → get promoted.

Because promotions aren’t just performance decisions, they’re also (and more importantly) social decisions. Despite this, this is where a lot of talented men get stuck:

They’re doing great work… but only their manager knows.

Meanwhile, a guy who’s not as “smart” somehow keeps moving up. Not because he’s a genius.

But because he knows how to play the game. Let’s talk about what that actually means (and how to do it without becoming a snake).

“Playing the game” doesn’t mean being fake

It means understanding one thing: Your career runs on visibility and trust.

Most men over-index on competence and ignore the other half of the process:

• Do people know what you do?
• Do they trust you under pressure?
• Would they bet their reputation on you?
• Do you have advocates in rooms you don’t sit in?

Because here’s a brutal truth. You can be the most competent guy in the building…

…and still be overlooked if no one important has a clear mental picture of you. Internal networking is how you build that picture.

A story you’ll recognise

This is a composite story (details changed), but I’ve seen this exact pattern play out over and over.

Two guys. Same company. Same level.Let’s call them Dan and Mike.

Dan was sharp. Quiet. Reliable.

He did the work nobody wanted. He fixed problems and carried projects.

Mike was… fine. Not useless. Not brilliant.

But he was always in conversations, always checking in with people and was always visible.

When a promotion opened up, Dan assumed it was his. He felt that he had earned it through all his hard work.

However to Dan’s surprise, leadership picked Mike.

Dan was furious. He told himself the company was political and unfair.

Then someone told him what was actually said in the decision meeting:

Dan had the output.

Mike had the output + relationships + narrative.

Mike wasn’t smarter, he was better positioned.

And once Dan swallowed his pride, he did something that changed everything:

He stopped treating work like a spreadsheet, and started treating it like a network.

Why internal networking is career leverage

Internal networking is not “making friends at work.”

It is about building professional relationships inside your company so that:

• You get access to information before it hits the masses
• You get pulled into better projects
• You find mentors and sponsors
• Your work travels further than your job title
• People speak your name when you’re not in the room

And the higher you go, the more the game changes:

At junior levels, you’re rewarded for execution.

At senior levels, you’re rewarded for influence.

If you can’t build trust across teams, you hit a ceiling.

The 5-move framework to network internally

Here’s how to do this without being awkward or transactional.

1) Map the real power lines

Most men network upwards only. They chase senior leaders and ignore the fact that having true influence requires you to have a wide reach.

Map these three groups:

• Decision makers (who signs off)
• Influencers (who leadership listens to)
• Gatekeepers (who controls time, access, or information)

Sometimes the most powerful person in your career path isn’t the Director that you aspire to be.

It’s the senior operator everyone relies on. The EA who controls calendars. The staff engineer who shapes the roadmap. The finance partner who approves headcount.

Be smart.

2) Build relationships before you need them

Networking when you’re desperate feels desperate. Instead, make it a system and embed it in your day to day life.

Try integrating this into your routine:

One new internal touchpoint per week.

A 15-minute coffee chat.

A quick Slack intro.

A “hey, I liked how you handled that” message.

This is a low pressure way to get started, and easy for you to remain consisten with.

3) Lead with curiosity, not self-promotion

When building relationships with your colleagues, a good approach is to make it about them.

Ask:

• “What are you focused on this quarter?”
• “What’s hard right now?”
• “What does success look like for your team?”
• “Where do you see things breaking soon?”

Then listen like a professional. Most people don’t remember your achievements, they remember how they felt after speaking with you.

4) Become useful in small ways

This is such an underrated cheat code. Don’t try to pull out all the stops to impress people. Instead, try your best to help people.

Here are examples you can try out:

• Share a template that saves them time
• Offer to take a small piece of work off their plate
• Make an intro to someone they need
• Summarise a meeting outcome and send it to the group
• Volunteer for cross-functional work that’s visible and valuable

Internal networking isn’t built just by coffee chats. It is about being seen as someone who is value adding and reliable

5) Turn a relationship into sponsorship

Mentors will give you advice. Sponsors give open up the door to opportunities.

A sponsor is someone senior-ish who:

• trusts you
• sees your work
• and is willing to advocate for you

How do you earn sponsorship?

This isn’t something you ask for directly, but you can earn it by doing the following:

• Deliver good work
• Communicate clearly
• Make their life easier
• Keep them in the loop
• Ask for feedback and apply it

Then, when the moment is right, you say:

“I’d love to grow here. If you hear of projects that would stretch me, I’d want you to think of me.”

That’s not being cringe.That’s clarity.

The script that make it easy

If you overthink outreach, use these.

To someone in another team:

“Hey [Name] — I’ve been seeing your work on [X]. I’m working on [Y] and I think there’s overlap. Would you be open to a quick 15 min chat next week? Mainly want to understand how your team is approaching it.”

After a good conversation:

“Appreciate the time today. Key takeaway for me was [X]. If it’s helpful, I can share [resource/intro/template] that’s worked for us.”

To your manager (so your networking helps your performance):

“I’m building relationships with [Teams A/B] because it’ll help us deliver [goal]. I’ll keep you posted on anything useful I learn.”

This is how you network without looking like you’re just collecting contacts.

The mistake that kills your reputation

Don’t network through gossip. This is a HUGE mistake. Some guys think “playing the game” means:

• trash talking people
• taking credit
• being slippery
• aligning with whoever is “winning” this week

That’s not playing the game, that is being a liability, and it will come back to bite you one day.

The men who rise fast and stay up there do two things:

1. They deliver.
2. They build trust across the building.

Trust is the real currency.

The Man Daily Way

If you want career growth, don’t just be competent. Be connected.

Because competence gets you hired.

But internal relationships get you:

• picked for high-leverage work
• promoted faster
• protected during restructures
• developed into leadership

So here’s your move:

This week, book one 15-minute chat with someone who sits outside your team.

Not to ask for anything. To learn what they’re working on… and how you can be useful.

Play the game the right way. Not with manipulation.

With strategy, presence, and integrity.

That’s how you stop being a hidden asset…

…and start becoming a known one.